In brief summary, we are considering those Job that can endanger our family life if not properly handled. We said that our career, like our family, is equally important, through our careers we get money to sustain our families and live a good live. Most of the time, career will be in conflict against family life. In this second piece of our article, I will be exposing to you some other jobs and career that can endanger family and marriages.
1) Jobs That Take You Away From God. Any job that takes you away from God Almighty will definitely affect your marriage. Jobs that involves telling lies, stealing, committing crimes for your company, tax evasion, bribery, corrupt practices, prostitution and sexual gratification for contract opportunities or to get a client to open account with your bank, etc. You can’t stay in these kind of jobs and think they will not affect your home. I read about a lady that was working with an events and tourism organization as an usher and protocol officer, and one of her duties was to sleep with guests if they so desire it. This they didn’t tell her before her appointment; she had to resign when she discovered this. Another story was of a wonderful lady who resigned from a lucrative banking job when she was asked to sleep with a “big customer” to get an account. Don’t stay in a job that can take you away from God and destroy your intimacy with the Almighty and eventually destroy your marriage and family life. You need God more than anybody. You need God more than that job. You need God now and you will need him tomorrow. Don’t destroy your life and your family life because of a bite of bread.
2) Jobs That Cannot Pay Your Bills. If you are working, you should at least, be able to meet your basic needs of life. If your ‘take-home-pay’ cannot ‘take you home’, I think you need another job. Money is needed to take good care of the home. In fact, there can be no Romance without Finance. If you want your wife to call you HONEY, give her MONEY. Don’t rest on your oars, improve yourself, and increase your capacity to make money. Go back to school if your present certificate makes your employer to pay you peanuts. Develop and improve yourself to be a better person. Don’t just say ‘God will do it’. Do something, do it now. Feed your family and keep your marriage.
3) Jobs That Separate You From Your Spouse More Than 75 Days A Year. Experts classified any job that separate couples more than 75 days a year as “Non-Family Friendly Jobs” (NFFJ). While jobs that separate couples more than 100 days a year are seen as “Family Enemy Jobs” (FEJ). Jobs that separate couples 150 days a year are known as “Family Cancer Jobs” (FCJ). Your family, your marriage become endangered as soon as your family enters a ‘NFFJ’ level; where you spend more than 75 days away from your spouse yearly. Anything can happen. It gives room for suspicion, negative thinking, lack of trust, temptation, sexual immoralities, lust, bad marriage and divorce. It is better to stay in a job that pays less but gives room to nurture your marriage and care for your children than to go for a job that makes you an Electronic Couples, (Couples that operate only through electronic means like phones, pager, fax, e-mails, etc). It is dangerous for you and your home; it exposes you to constant travel, keeping of two homes, loneliness in raising the children, etc. You need to count the cost before you venture into this kind of job.
4) Jobs That Destroy Intimacy. Experts say, For a couple to become intimate, they must have high ‘couples time’ or ‘initiate talking time (ITT)’. In fact, it was said that every couple should have at least 200 romantic hours per year; if they must become intimate and build a better marriage. The less the romantic hours, the higher the level of marriage destruction. In a city like Lagos, many couples are having less than 30 hours a year as romantic hours. That explains reason marriages are difficult for many especially in cities. Please note that romantic hours or intimate talking time is not the period you spend together watching television or even making love, it is the period you spend together playing or talking intimately. Any job that does not give room for that is not a family-friendly job. Some people leave home by 5am only to get back home around midnight everyday of the week. No marriage can grow in that kind of situation. That is why I am of the opinion that both husband and wife should not be in the banking sector at the same time or doing any job that makes both of them to leave home before dawn only to come back just before midnight.
5) Any Jobs You Do Without Wisdom. Every job is demanding and time consuming. In fact, what your employer is paying for is your skill, expertise and your time. You are the one that needs to sit down with your spouse and talk it through. Must both of you be in white collar jobs? Must you work overtime? Must you get a ‘better’ job that will take you away from your family? How about taking a casual leave once in a while just to be with your spouse; to talk, connect and reconnect? Must you be the one traveling every time? Must you always be on the road? You need to apply wisdom so that your marriage can be the best.
6) Any Job That Affect Your Sex Life. Experts says every couple should make love at least 45 times a year, any couple that makes love less than 20 times a year is said to be in a ‘sexless marriage’. One of the major things that affect sex in marriage is the kind of job the couples have. Any job that makes you to sleep with your spouse less than 45 times a year, for any reason, is not a family-friendly job. If you don’t do something fast, it will destroy your marriage. Again you need to talk to your spouse about this and agree about it.
